Tough Day

Tuesday, Allyssa had her 9 month check up. We are a little off from her birthdate due to her hospitalization. Monday night the dog kept howling and wouldn't shut up. Then the baby woke up and cried for about 30 minutes at 4 and again at 5. By the time morning came David and I were both on edge and sleepy. Because of the drowsiness we both snapped at each other as I was getting loaded up for the drive to Harlingen. Cranky and tired when we reached the doctor's office the receptionist told me that I couldn't see Kia (my CPNP) because I'd switched doctors. I told her that I didn't switch doctors and she showed me a paper I'd signed several weeks ago when Allyssa had bronchitis and I had to see another doctor (it was Ash Wednesday and I had no help and my regualr doctor doesn't accept patients from 4 to 5:30 in the afternoon while the clear the office for the Night Clinic, so a little after 4, I went to a doctor here in town because I was scared to wait because Allyssa was gasping). I told the receptionist that I didn't want to switch doctors and that the other office made me sign that paper to be seen and I had already told someone at my regular doctor's office what had happened the last time I brought Allyssa in. They said that the paper trail just caught up to me and that whatever I talked about last time didn't matter and that I couldn't see Kia. That's when sleepy Laura got crankier. I raised my voice and demanded that I get to see Kia because they called me the day before and confirmed my appointment and I had an appointment and I needed to see Kia because that is Allyssa's CPNP. They told me that that isn't how things work and to have a seat and they'd talk about it for a minute with someone else. So I sat down and proceeded to bawl. I don't mean cry. I was bawling, loudly. That is when Tonya, the meanest lady yet that I was about to meet, came out to usher me into an office so that I wasn't such a scene. The first thing this 40 something year old prejudiced woman said to me was, "How old are you?" I told her that that was none of her business and asked why she wanted to know. Duh. I look young and she's accusing me of being a teenage mother. She said that she is trying to help me and needs to know my age. I said that my age did not matter and that I am Allyssa's mom and that is what matters. She said, "Look, I need to know your age because I'll explain things differently to you if you are 17 than if you are in your twenties." I'm not kidding. She said that. Prejudiced old lady! That is when I proceeded to tell her that I do not deserve to be asked that question. I told her that I worked for many years, went to college, and have been married for 4 years and that she shouldn't judge me based on how old I look. "I'm in my twenties." I told her. She flet guilty then and told me that she was jealous that I looked so young. Then she insinuated that I needed to apologize (which I did) and pretty much beg to see Kia (which I did). Then she told me that I am a bad mother for crying in front of my baby. No joke. She said, "...bad mother. You shouldn't cry in front of your baby. You are upsetting her." Meanwhile, Allyssa continued to look at my smiling face (yes there were tears, but I know better than to frown when she's looking) and wave her book around. I did get to see Kia. I cried the whole time I waited to see her in the waiting room. Then in the exam room while waiting I dropped the container that held Allyssa's scooters (puffed cereal). They fell all over the floor. I cried as I sat Allyssa in her car seat and cleaned up the floor. Then, I gave Allyssa some zwieback toast and cried until Kia came in. Kia was very nice to me and made sure that I was okay before she examined Allyssa, who is healthy. Allyssa is 26 inches long and 18 lbs 8 oz. Certainly, I would have been more level headed about this whole ordeal had I not been exhausted in the first place. Life goes on.